Sorry for my absence, readers. Life has been a hectic blessing lately. Between nannying, working at the feed store, and other miscellaneous jobs such as babysitting and painting, I don’t have much time for leisure or rest. I am learning, however, that sleeping at night is a precious gift I’ve taken for granted way too long.
Since I last wrote, lots has happened and lots has not. I’m back in the states, not living with my family, got to vote for the first time in a presidential election, and am growing into an adult. But even with all that, it is hard for me to decipher, after living the most sanctifying, adventurous year of my life, what constitutes as a significant event and what doesn’t. That probably sounds weird, but I don’t know how else to put it.
Let me explain…
Because I am back in my hometown—where everything is routine and doesn’t ever change—life mostly seems mundane. It’s hard for me to adjust to this normalcy because, as a young adult, exploration and change and newness have been my norm; but not so for now. However, I am not ungrateful for the culture and place in which I was raised, I’ve just been introduced to different ways of life, so now my desires and goals have been shifted and are expanding.
Here’s a lame illustration: It’s as if I’ve been eating Dryer’s ice cream my whole life and someone just graciously opened my eyes to Blue Bell, and now I can’t go back to what I knew.
I continue learning that I’ll never be done learning. While I love living “on the edge” and praying for divine financial providence due to not working for a paycheck, it is so rewarding to reap what I’ve sown in working 50 hour weeks. I’m learning that jobs can be a blessing; I am constantly presented with opportunities to be a witness to my coworkers and customers. This is one of the many reasons I don’t use the term “mission field” very often because really, as a believer, my charge to share the good news is not continent specific. The vessel in which I minister the word may change country to country, but it is the same word no matter my location.
Before returning to the states I had prayed for change, for things to be different and completely unlike before I left ‘home’. I asked for new communities, job positions, etc. And let me tell ya, He heard me. I got more than what I asked for and what I honestly, on my own, couldn’t handle, but that was the point. When I initially was back here, I found myself in some really unhealthy, ungrateful patterns, and I always seemed to be in a funk.
Everything made sense on one hand, and on the other nothing. I didn’t (and quite frankly still don’t) know how to reconcile all that I’ve seen, heard, and lived with where I am now at.
So, my word for 2017 is gratefulness. On great days, on bad ones, I must be grateful. Grateful for His daily giving of new mercies; for breath; for bread; for His blood shed; for the Rock which I can undoubtedly cling to and trust.
Therefore let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus let us offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe…”